Happy Birthday Grandma Sam

You would have been 73 years old today. 73 is so young. There are so many people that are older than that and are still going strong. I wish you were one of those people. It makes me so mad and sad. If they had just found that first stroke, if they had just listened to Aunt Lezlie when she told them that that is what she thought had happened to you. After taking a first aid class and hearing all the signs of someone having a stroke, you were definitely projecting. Why couldnt they have caught it damn it!

I wish that I had spent more time with you. Sure I was in the hospital with you a lot at the end, but I mean before. I wish that I could have done more things with you as I got older. I wish that you were still here. And I wish that you could have met Cain. You would love him grandma, he is the cutest little thing. But I think you know him already dont you. You know that I not one that is religious. But after months of trying I just happen to become pregnant the month after you leave us? I dont think that was a coincidence. Then when all the IC stuff happened, they just happened to catch it in time, I just happened to carry him to term? I dont think that that was a coincidence either. One of the last things you said to me in one of the last lucid conversations we had you told me not to wait to have a family. you helped me have that family didnt you grandma? thank you. I love you so much.

I am still in school grandma. I am having a hard time right at the momnent, with both my math class and considering changing majors, but I am doing it. I promised you remember? you told me to stick with it. I am doing this for you grandma, and Cain.

We miss you soooo much grandma. Its hard to believe that you have been gone for a year and a half. I wish that you were still here. We had some good times. I love you. Happy birthday!!